Today

I feel anxious and overwhelmed. I feel a bit angry and powerless. I feel that my struggles with MyWife are futile and hopeless. I feel like things are never going to get better. I feel ashamed. I’m going to send my family disclosure to my cousins and I’m scared to do that. I don’t know […]

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Hello God

I recently started reading Abba’s Child by Brennan Manning.  It was recommended to me by the pastor of a church I’ve been attending recently.  I don’t know why, but I find this kind of stuff so hard to read.  I can read a good fiction book like something by James Rollins or Steve Berry in as […]

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I Did My Disclosure Today…

I guess what I can say about it is that it wasn’t as bad as I thought.  It was painful and shameful.  Terrifying and nerve wracking but my wife didn’t get up and run out of there screaming.  She did’t look at me with disgust.  She didn’t even get angry. I am scared that she […]

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Fermi’s Paradox

I listen to a lot of podcasts. I thought this was good excerpt from the May 19th edition of This American Life. I don’t know why I though it was so good, other than it spoke about someone in a very similar situation to me. Here is the audio from Act 2: Act II – […]

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I need to brush my teeth…

I thought this was supposed to be getting easier.  It’s not. I had though that knowing more about all of this would help.  It hasn’t. I thought I would be doing better, but I’m not. Addiction, or at least sex addiction is lonely.  The opposite of addiction is supposed to be connection.  Why is connection […]

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First Draft of My Disclosure

So maybe not actually the first draft, but a draft.  They say you can’t heal without doing a disclosure, nor will your marriage ever heal.  I hope they are right, but I don’t see how my marriage will ever heal after she hears all this.  There’s just so much, it’s such an insane amount and […]

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